I was at vcf and found myself engaging in really superficial converstaions. When i'm around ppl i don't know well, i totally shutdown- pure surface talk. I also found face stuck in a perma smile. The kind that doesn't convey any real emotion but aims to make others assume that you're 'friendly' or 'happy'.
Previously, i've had conversations w/ ppl about how christians feel pressured to be 'happy' all the time. And i think i've been 'criticized' cuz i'm not bouncing off the walls- that i'm too serious.
Jeeper. Can't a person be content and mellow at the same time? Just cuz i'm not acting like Tigger does not mean i'm depressed. I'll still laugh at your jokes- only if they're funny (i have a high threshold).
But yes, i do find myself falling into this trap. I feel as if i'm not testifying rightly if the image i give off is that my life is not perfect all the time. When i was showering today, i realized that witnessing is not us make believing to others that we have everything together. Witnessing can be done through our REACTIONS to the frustrating circumstances and stupid people around us. We're constantly reminded at church that following Christ is the 'road less taken'...and if our lives reflect that... why can't our actions? I'm not justifying actions of pessimism but if i'm stressed, then i'm stressed. If i'm upset at something, thn that's what it is. I'm a christian but i'm not stupid. I hate feeling this pressure to coat my every emotion so it's nice and fluffy for everyone else.
I'll complain if i have to but at the end of the day, i acknowledge that it's MY GOD that gets me through it.
Previously, i've had conversations w/ ppl about how christians feel pressured to be 'happy' all the time. And i think i've been 'criticized' cuz i'm not bouncing off the walls- that i'm too serious.
Jeeper. Can't a person be content and mellow at the same time? Just cuz i'm not acting like Tigger does not mean i'm depressed. I'll still laugh at your jokes- only if they're funny (i have a high threshold).
But yes, i do find myself falling into this trap. I feel as if i'm not testifying rightly if the image i give off is that my life is not perfect all the time. When i was showering today, i realized that witnessing is not us make believing to others that we have everything together. Witnessing can be done through our REACTIONS to the frustrating circumstances and stupid people around us. We're constantly reminded at church that following Christ is the 'road less taken'...and if our lives reflect that... why can't our actions? I'm not justifying actions of pessimism but if i'm stressed, then i'm stressed. If i'm upset at something, thn that's what it is. I'm a christian but i'm not stupid. I hate feeling this pressure to coat my every emotion so it's nice and fluffy for everyone else.
I'll complain if i have to but at the end of the day, i acknowledge that it's MY GOD that gets me through it.
posted by A Mandar @ 2:47 a.m.
1 Comments:
At 3:51 a.m.,
irene said…
i've been thinking about this alot tooo lately...that's kinda why i thought Saved! was interesting...because there ARE all these christian stereotypes that exist in our "christian" popular culture...and why do we feel so compelled to subject ourselves to these stereotypes? i think its ok to not be happy-go-lucky all the time. its ok to be angered about things. it's ok to go express these emotions -- i mean, look at the psalmists! all their writings are FULL of emotion! (my emotion development prof says that if u want to learn about emotion, read the Psalms).
in conclusion,
i agree.
:)
Post a Comment
<< Home