Bored

My second official day of summer, as in no thinking of school, as in no notes to review or textbooks to read, no lectures to watch, no Timmies coffee to sustain me through another 2hr, 9am lecture. "None of the above" would in this case BE the coorect answer. Being my second day to 'summer-ize', you'd think i'd actually be able to do something "summery". Sigh. Worked from 9:30-5. Long yet not so bad shift. Got to train someone else, so i didnt' do much myself. I think i spent most of my time trying to give away my saturday shift. BOOO...everyone's busy. By the end of a 8hr shift, you just feel like it's time for bed, except the rest of the world is still living in daylight. Originally, the latter part of the day was suppose to be either softball practice or sandwich run. But i ended up doing...what's that you say? yes indeedee, "None of the above" [is again the correct MC answer]. So lethargic and out of it...yet bored at the same time. If anything, after work, there was this feeling of 'omg, gotta go home and study, which exam is next' lol. It's like i'm conditioned. How? No idea- i didn't even work that hard to begin with.

Back to my story. I started reading "Cross & Cressant" (I think that's how you spell it). It's about Islam and how we can be a witness to Muslims. I got it at Urbana back in december 03. And needless to say, i've only slimmed through 2 of the i think 9 books i got there. So sad. But this book is actually pretty good. Very considerate that we're not ignortant towards any part of the culture and that our "witnessnessing" is not an act of pride but truely out of love. He also brought up the point that Christians are not the only knows who may know God. Jesus said, "I am the Way", he meant he's the Only way to the Father. That means if someone doesn't accept Jesus, they cannot know God as father, cannot enjoy his blessings, and cannot recognize that Jesus is the Son- all of which is true if you look into Islam. God being a father is unperceiveable. He gave the example of when God spoke to Abimelech in a dream. Before that, Abraham didn't think anyone outside his family can have a relationship with God but he realized that ppl outside the covenant can still communicate with God. When i read, i think i got a taste of what Abraham felt. It was ignorant of me to think that Muslims are completely out of the loop when it comes to God. I'm enjoying this book. Hopefully this will better prepare me to become a smarter & more informed witness at UTSC in *sniff* <2 WEEKS!!!! ahh!!!! Or a witness at all to my Muslim classmates. I find myself reluctant to take an initiative. I get scared. I'm not sure why, maybe it's because it's intimidating- they're so disciplined and so faithful to their creed. Christians can learn alot from them when it comes to disciplining oneself. I guess i'm trying to say that i really admire that about them.

The last matter on a. Mandar's heart is about this saturday. BOOO. I have to work. BOOO!!!! It's my softball team's first playoff game and i can't make it. My parents are also going to ottawa to visit a family friend, their daughter was my bestfriend when we were young and i haven't seen her in..5yrs!!! And i can't go. BOOO. But on a lighter note. By not going away for the weekend, i will be able to attenn an annual shopping spree w/ some of my gals form high school. Looking forward to that. Quite. he hee. Not only the shopping part but just to catch up. I've only seen them maybe 1-2 times this summer.

All this free time helped me realize that i need to have things to do. We all do. We're not meant to simply be ppl who sit around with no purpose in mind; with no goal. We need to be driven and constantly be on a road to attain that goal. Although we have that long term goal ahead, we also need short term ones to keep us on our feet. Summer does not equal retirement. It just equals no school. Which leads me to my next point. Goal for the next <2 weeks (and i hope you guys, whoever will help me be faithful to this)

1. Finish reading the Cross & Cressant and perhaps ANOTHER BOOK *gasp* ambitious, i know he hee.
2. Prepare myself spiritually for the next semester
3. I want to say to actively share my faith to others. But i'm not sure how to go about doing so because i think school is the best mission field right now.
4. Similar to what i said before. To re-evaluate. Many things.

Freedom!

Good stuff, Good stuff. No more textbook, no more notes. Helllllllo sleep ^__^. Yep, that's right, I finished writing my last exam at 4:45pm today. Exciting stuff.

I can't believe I'm starting a "blog". But after reading Adrians, i thought maybe it is a good idea to have one. It's a good way to keep those i don't see often updated. I miss my peoples people :(

Let's see where to begin. Let's begin from this summer. God's been so faithful- espeically to our fellowship. I'd say it begin at our fellowship retreat back in late June. HIV! It's all about HIV (=honesty, integrity, vulnerability). Lot story short, God's added 3 brothers to His family. Three!!!! Whoaaa :) We've also been able to find a new direction/purpose. It's so exciting to be part of this growth and to be entrusted with new Christians. I think having seen these three people accept Christ has renewed the fire in all of our hearts to be more of a witness. It's also really humbling. Although i wasn't one of the people who was able to pray with them to accept Christ, God humbled me through all this. In fact, He kept me from sinning. I think if i did pray for acceptance with them, I would have easily become proud. So thank God for that also! ^___^

Although I've spent much of this summer in school. I have to be thankful for that also. It's always tempting to go out when the weather is nice but I love what i'm learning. This kind of knowledge just allows me to have a greater appreciation of creation. Of His creation. I can't say that with any more conviction as this point. It's so amazing how smart, creative and efficient our biological systems are made. For being able to know that, I give thanks.

I've also been challenged lately about my faith. More so to take steps of faith, to have more faith. Especially when it comes to...perhaps quitting my job!?! *gasp*
It's also been difficult to keep my emotions/feelings in check. Especially since i'm going to be 20 in less than 2 months. Aiya. And with that, comes, well, and end to a certain commitment I made a while ago (although i' have not been too strong). Sigh. I hate to say these things explicitly. But i've had to remind myself many times the kind of man i want to fall in love with. To "notice" him because of his love and passion for God. I hope he's praying for me also. And i hope he'll hurry it up...or that I'll hurt it up by becoming more of the woman he needs. I hope i don't sound whiny. It's all good ^___^ But i guess wiht that, another issue also came up. I don't want to settle for anything but the best, but whose best am i seeking? Mine? My parents? or God's? I really need to take these 2 weeks i have off to reevaluate and rethink alot of these things.

What's ahead?
Now that school OFFICIALLY offer. I want to catch up on reading, sleep, jogging, see people!!! And i'm looking forward to school ha haa.